What’s your Weight Loss Formula?

I don’t buy a lot of the crap that the media cranks out with regards to weight loss, especially those reality shows for grossly obese people. While, yes, I’m sure a combination of diet and exercise is a surefire weight loss formula, not everyone does it that way. Just once, I’d like to see this concept fleshed out.

weight loss formulaFor example, the times when I lost a considerable amount of weight never had anything to do with any weight loss formula. At least not one that was sound. So personally, it has gotten to the point where I equate healthy living to being hungry.

But it’s not like I’m an advocate of fad diets either. I know that these things get a little crazy and you end up really screwed up because all you can think about is a piece of bread or whatever. Also, I feel like when you cut a part of your regular diet out, it makes you crabby.

So what is my personal weight loss formula? It involves getting really sick to the point of crying because of how uncomfortable I really am. As you can probably surmise, it also involves being unable to keep anything down for more than a few hours—yes, that means puking electrolytes at 3 AM in the morning.

If that sounds a little idiotic, that’s probably because it is. And the thing is, I know that it is more than a little foolish to think of this as a weight loss trick but that’s the only thing that has been effective for me. Getting really sick has gotten me through about 30 pounds in a little less than 2 weeks.

This isn’t to say that I induce illness, I’m not that crazy—I know that that is unhealthy on so many levels. But when I think back to how much weight I lost in the past, I’m inclined to think “Oh, that’s right, I lost that weight because I got sick.” Quickly ruling out a healthy lifestyle is an impulse for me.

I also know some people who insist that the perfect weight loss formula is a diet based on mostly oatmeal. Just thinking about it makes me gag—who can live on mush three times a day? It makes me think of how food is portrayed as a villain in these times.

weight loss formulaOther people insist that clear, tasteless broth is a weight loss formula that is completely foolproof. And I can’t help but reply, “Of course it’s effective, you’re basically drinking hot water.” This seems not only crazy to me, but also a red-eye towards shaking fits in the morning due to your body’s lack of sugar.

So what’s my point if I’m not pro crazy diets? My point is people are ridiculous and will always have their own weight loss formulas. 90% of which are probably unsafe and unrealistic.

Is there a lesson to all this, a position where insight can be achieved? No, not really. Just making an observation, is all.